How To Deal With Anger, The Most Overlooked Emotion
Anger is a normal human emotion. It is a strong emotion characterized by feelings of annoyance, frustration, and hostility. It is a normal and natural response to certain situations, such as feeling threatened or experiencing injustice. However, when anger is excessive or misdirected, it can lead to problems in personal relationships, at work, and in other areas of life. It's not always easy to express anger in positive ways--but it's important that we do.
When you're angry, there are two ways you can express your feelings: passive-aggressive and aggressive. Passive-aggressive behavior means you express your anger indirectly by being mean or rude instead of speaking up directly about how you feel. Passive-aggressive behavior is a way of expressing anger indirectly, rather than directly addressing the issue or person that is causing the anger. This can take many forms, such as sarcasm, procrastination, "forgetting" to do something, or making subtle negative comments. Passive-aggressive behavior can be difficult to recognize and deal with, because the person expressing it may not be aware of it themselves, or may deny that they are angry. This can lead to confusion, resentment, and a lack of resolution in conflicts.
Aggressive behavior means that you lash out at others with physical violence or verbal abuse when they do something that makes you mad. Aggressive behavior is a way of expressing anger directly and forcefully, often with the intention of intimidating or harming others. It can take many forms, such as verbal abuse, physical violence, or destruction of property. Aggressive behavior can be dangerous and harmful to both the person expressing the anger and the people around them. It's not a healthy way to express anger and it can lead to negative consequences such as criminal charges, legal actions, social isolation and even physical harm to others.
Neither of these approaches is healthy for relationships or for building trust with other people in your life. They also don't help us learn how to deal with our emotions in healthier ways that don't hurt anyone else! Instead, try using positive communication skills like active listening (listening carefully without interrupting), reflecting back what the other person said so they know you understand their point of view, asking questions if there's anything else they want to add before moving on from this topic of conversation (which shows respect for their time), and saying "thank you" whenever someone does something nice for us.
It’s important for us to learn how to express anger in positive ways so that we don’t hurt ourselves or others with this strong emotion!
Can we just ignore our anger?
Ignoring anger or repressing it can be harmful in the long run. Anger is a normal emotion and it is important to acknowledge and address it in a healthy way. When you repress or ignore anger, it can lead to bottled-up emotions, which can manifest in negative ways such as physical symptoms, depression, anxiety or even unhealthy coping mechanisms like substance abuse. Instead of ignoring anger, it is important to find healthy ways to express and manage it, such as talking to a therapist, practicing relaxation techniques, or finding a physical activity that helps release tension. It's also important to try to understand the source of your anger and address any underlying issues that may be contributing to it.
So how can we express our anger in safe and positive ways?
There are several ways to express anger in safe and positive ways.
- Communication. Expressing your feelings in a calm and clear manner can help resolve conflicts and improve relationships. It's important to listen actively and show empathy to the other person's perspective.
- Writing. Journaling or writing a letter (even if you don't send it) can be a cathartic way to release pent-up emotions and gain clarity on the situation. This can also help you identify patterns in your anger and find ways to address them.
- Physical activity. Engaging in regular physical activity can help release tension and anger in a positive way. Exercise releases endorphins, which can improve mood, and can also provide an outlet to release pent-up energy.
- Relaxation techniques. Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation can help calm the body and mind, reducing the physical symptoms of anger such as increased heart rate and muscle tension.
- Humor. Laughter can be a great way to diffuse anger, and can help put things in perspective. Finding humor in a difficult situation can also help to reduce feelings of resentment or hostility.
- Time out. Taking a time-out when you start feeling angry can help prevent the situation from escalating. Find a quiet place to take a break and practice deep breathing or other relaxation techniques.
- Seek professional help. If you find that you are unable to express or manage your anger in healthy ways, consider seeking help from a therapist or counselor. They can help you identify the underlying causes of your anger, teach you techniques to manage it, and provide support as you work through your feelings.
Anger is a normal and natural emotion, but it can become a problem when it is excessive or misdirected. Ignoring or repressing anger can lead to negative consequences, while expressing it in safe and positive ways can help improve relationships and resolve conflicts. There are some ways to express anger in a safe and positive way so it's important to find the right strategies that work for you and to be patient with yourself as you learn to manage your anger. Remember, it's ok to feel angry, but it's important to learn how to express and manage it in a healthy way.